The End of Everything on a Saturday? Naturally.

I'm always fascinated by predictions for the end of the world. Not that I buy into all of them, but I think it's funny how so many people are not only trying so hard to figure out the exact day we erupt into fire or ash or whatever, but that they really seem to be looking forward to it. I mean, they make signs, they march, they throw parties, they knock on doors. Wouldn't it be better to just schlep along and be pleasantly surprised by all the awesome demons popping out everywhere? Or if it's not so cool (like maybe another flood or something) wouldn't you still rather be surprised? Either way, it's not like we can prepare. What are those canned peanuts and bottles of water doing over there? End of the world survival kit? Smart!

I just heard about May 21st being the possible Rapture. Whenever I hear the word Rapture, it's usually in a pretty good context associated with heaving bosoms and such. Apparently, the real one isn't so great. Or is it? No more Kardashians. No more American Idol. No more Glee. I know, some of you like that stuff, but it all evens out. No more Fringe or Twinkies either. We all suffer. Happy now?

So what's your poison? Zombies? That apocalypse is poised to happen at any moment. First person shooters have made me into a head-shootin' killing machine. Bring it!! Nostradamus's Big Kablooey? That already came and went and some people STILL say he knew his crap. Skynet's Judgment Day? That passed back in 1997. I was working as a telemarketer back then, so that's pretty close to languishing in hell being watched by robot overlords. The Mayan's 2012 Bash? Yet to be seen. But, they couldn't even see the Spaniards coming, so I'll take that with a grain of salt. KABLOW!!! Any Mayans in the audience? All in good fun. You know I love ya!

You gotta hand it to anyone who seriously commits to an end of the world date within their lifetime. They're putting all of their credibility eggs into one basket. The sad part is when that day comes and goes and they come up with some lame excuses to save face. Oh, Nostradamus was looking at a comet instead of a star. He was CLOSE on some stuff. Close don't count in Doomsday!! I'll give these people a break. At least they get behind something. We'll see what happens tomorrow. If it does turn out to be the Rapture, that should be interesting and I don't have to mow my lawn. If not, at least it's the weekend. Bulls vs Heat.

If the end does come tomorrow, here's one more pro and con. Well, three cons if you count the demons and judgment. Bad news first) People like me will have to deal with a whole lot of smug doomsayers. Pro) With the dead rising from the grave, we could kill Osama AGAIN. USA!!!!!

[Editorial note - The spell checker isn't working. Must be a sign.]

World Horror '11

It's been a little while since World Horror came and went, but that's no reason to forget about it right? Ok, so I've been slacking as far as updates, but here goes. This was my first WHC and it was great! It was held in Austin, TX which was also great! I was on the Vampire Mega Panel (which was SO much better than the Vampire Mini Panel) with none other than Steve Niles of 30 Days of Night fame. Freaking awesome! There was a moment when the moderator asked the panelists what their favorite vampire movie / book was and I contemplated lying. Whenever I'm asked that question, I say 30 Days of Night and Necroscope. Is it bad etiquette to mention another panelist's work like that? Does it make me look like a suck-up? Eh, who gives a crap. I told the truth with the preface, "Not that I'm kissing ass or anything, but..." Seemed to go just fine. Afterward, I got a chance to talk to Steve. Funny, but we seemed to see eye to eye on a lot of vampire type stuff. Here's a pic of me and him. Hopefully I'm maintaining some semblance of cool here.

The signing was fun. Met some great people. Thanks to all of you who stopped by to say hello! I even got to sign someone's Necronomicon-esque autograph book. THAT was cool! On my off time, I had a burger at Casino el Camino. If you're ever in Austin, GO THERE!! Amazing burgers and awesome chili fries. Not so amazing parking on 6th Street, but worth it.

All in all, it was a great time. Hopefully I'll be able to hit WHC next year. Now, back to the grind.

You can't have just one

So yesterday was Free Comic Book Day. And...I didn't even look in my local comic book store's direction. I know, I know. I'm terrible. I'm also not a rich man and am very weak when it comes to buying comics. Here's how the pattern goes:

Phase 1) I love comics. Always have. Always will. I want to keep up with the story lines and just plain enjoy having the books in my hands. I would like to purchase comics every week.

Phase 2) I'll make the trip to the store every Wednesday. You know...just to get away from my desk and indulge in the geeky wonder that is the comic book store. I'll set a budget in stone, something I can afford, and STICK TO IT. Don't worry about back issues. I just need to accept the gaping holes in my collection.

Phase 3) Wow! This is going really well! I'm so happy. I look forward to New Comics Day almost as much as New Video Game / DVD Day. My budget idea rocks. After all, it's one of my few entertainment expenses since I don't get out to bars or fine dining very often. YAY!!

Phase 4) This is a slow New Comics Day. Only 1 issue came out that I want. Why let my budget go to waste? Maybe I'll take a gander at some series I've never read. Ooooo! What's this one? Pretty colors!!!

Phase 5) So now I'm into my original series as well as 57 new ones. I'm invested in the story lines and want to know what happens in every one. Plus, I LOVE the weight of that stack of new comics in my hands every week. The pile is just so mind-numbingly heavy and smells so good! New comics smell differently than new books. Like different perfumes for two different, yet equally enticing, ladies. God, I love Wednesdays! Plus...it's still cheaper than going to bars and paying $8 for a Bud draft.

Phase 6) Ok, so this isn't cheaper than going to a bar. Still...I gotta have my comics. I work hard! I DESERVE THEM!!! It's not a problem! I can stop any time I want!! Stop looking at me like that!!! They smell so good. I love them. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!!

Phase 7) Intervention. Somehow I stop buying comics altogether and take time to read through the stacks and stacks of issues I never had time to read during phases 3-6. I can pay my water bill again now. I guess that's nice.

I went to Free Comic Book Day last year, stuck to my guns and only picked up the freebies. It was fun, but I felt like a meth addict being led on a short tour through Lindsay Lohan's house that ended with me only being able to lick the bottom of her purse. Just too much of a tease! So I passed on Free Comic Book Day this year. Not because I wanted to but because, in the words of the great Wilford Brimley, it's the right thing to do.