A rare weather post...the moon doesn't count

I know it's winter. I know winter is supposed to be cold. This is something else, though. This is worthy of mention on a journal that I would never want to devolve into a discussion about the weather. This is the kind of snot-freezing cold that freezes the pee in the pee tubes (I'm not a doctor, all right?). This is the type of cold that effects my work. Fortunately, I'm a writer so it's a good effect. I get to wear my jammies at my desk and sip hot tea or coffee or whatever while nodding appreciatively at the sounds of people trying to start their cars outside. It's the sort of cold that makes me love my job. Writing isn't easy and it can tax the fortitude of the strongest of souls, but it does have its perks. I may not get health benefits or annual raises, but I do get to skip the morning commute through this demonic kind of winter day specifically designed to shrink certain male parts into raisins. Just let me have this, ok? Everyone else gets things like "retirement benefits" and "job security". I get to flagrantly throw up air quotes instead of scraping my windshield at 7AM. Wait...I guess those were real quotes. Ah, screw it.